I want to say I learned something from this book but it was just so heavy-handed with the numerous theories in the end that I doubt I will remember hardly anything coming month or two. And few pearls of wisdom I decided to commit to memory were pushed out by the heavy-handed serving of superfluous information later on. So I think if this book aimed to teach long-term it missed the goal on this. P57 “If you only feel calm through meditation, you might struggle to keep your cool when you can’t fit meditation into your busy schedule. Flexibility, such as having more than one way to feel calm, can be important in reaching your goals.” goals must be valuable and within reach (be on the right side of sunk-cost fallacy); action increases commitment pay attention and make the middle moments memorable when you want to give up; set subgoals; create landmarks

P74 “all-or-nothing goals” i.e. a college degree vs. accumulative goals” i.e. working out 5x per week or reading 20 books this year You’re more likely to detect a temptation when you make a decision that affects multiple occasions; we call this using a broad decision frame. If you decide in advance what to eat for lunch every day this month, you’ll probably choose healthier foods than if you decide on each lunch each day. Thirty lunch decisions are more consequential than one, so you’ll notice any self-control problems. This book looks at how how our we tend to look at goals, where the pitfalls are in pursuing a goal, and how we can best keep momentum towards our goal depending on our current progress and commitment levels. The way we sustain our motivation changes as we change. A really good reminder that "long middles" are dangerous--we are excited at the beginning and end, but it is very easy to lose momentum in the middle.

About Ayelet Fishbach

It’s a surprising anecdote to be offered by an expert in the realm of setting and achieving goals, but her message gets right to the heart of one of the deceptively simple lessons in her book: choose your goals wisely. Here’s another example. Imagine you’re doing yoga. You’re at home, on your mat. And while you’re in downward dog you come eye to eye with a giant dust ball. Maybe that’s the last straw. Maybe it’s at this point that you realize it’s actually been forever since you’ve last cleaned. And so, you get up and whip out the vacuum cleaner. Right. Now. In this case, your sense of falling behind ended up motivating action.

She argues, essentially, that activities associated with goals are a zero-sum game. I don't see why that must be the case—why can't an activity be associated with two goals and be equally important for both? Maybe that would work for two intrinsically motivated goals? I wasn't entirely satisfied with her explanation. Another guideline in choosing a goal with staying power is to frame it as something you intend to do (an “approach goal”) rather as something you don’t want to do (an “avoidance goal”).Finally, we hold goals for other people, and they hold goals for us. Marie and Pierre Curie wanted their two daughters to do well in school. We assume they cared mostly about science, which could have prepared their oldest, Irène, to win her own Nobel Prize in chemistry in 1935. Irène, too, won with her husband, with whom she was working. Fishbach includes chapters about self-control and patience. Her strategies for increasing self-control and managing temptations were fantastic, and I've included many in my article explaining ways to procrastinate less. In short, self-control is a two-step process: detect or become aware of temptations, and then battle them. Fishbach writes,

But not only could you be the one giving advice, you could also start to look for a possible role model – someone you could emulate on your way to achieving your goal. It could be anyone really – a friend, parent, teacher, or colleague. But your role model should know you exist. Why? Because a great role model is someone who doesn’t only set an example; they help set expectations for you. Ayelet Fishbach is theJeffrey Breakenridge Keller Professor of Behavioral Science and Marketing and IBM Corporation Faculty Scholar attheChicago Booth School of Business. The final, crucial ingredient to goal-setting is fun. I know. I just basically talked you through a bunch of homework you should do to get stuff done. And now I’m telling you to have fun, too?Bear with me. In The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, Mark Twain’s titular character notes that “work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do, and that play consists of whatever a body is not obliged to do.” That is basically another way of defining intrinsic motivation. Intrinsic motivation is when you do something just because. Because you want to. Because you have fun doing it. Because it’s your dream. Because. Maybe there isn’t even a proper reason. It just feels good. Setting the goal in the first place is perhaps the most obvious one, but as Fishbach explains, there are many ways in which people tend to get it wrong. One step we can take in goal setting is to focus on aligning our goals to our own intrinsic motivation.So when you’re setting goals, try defining them in terms of benefits, rather than costs. It’s better to aim for “finding a job,” rather than “applying for a job.” Achieving a goal is exciting; completing the means is a chore. 2. Find the fun path. Trying to stay motivated and make serious progress in whatever you’re trying to achieve in life can sometimes feel like an impossible task. But it doesn’t have to be. There’s a simple fix – and it just so happens to be in your control. It all starts with changing your circumstances. Most importantly, you need to define your goals. You need to pay attention to maintaining momentum, stay focused when you’ve got a billion other things on your plate and get your friends and family involved. And when you make your behavior and environment work for rather than against you, your goal of getting that raise, or that strong healthy body, or that tax return form sorted, or that new language learned, will be yours in no time!