A Mindfulness Guide for the Frazzled

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To help ensure that our meetings run smoothly and in line with the values of Frazzled Cafe, we ask that all participants agree to follow these guidelines:

I found the book sobering, joyous and hopeful. There is a lot of food for thought in there and a lot of useful info about inspiring initiatives and resources. These include Ruby’s own Frazzled Cafe to help people who are finding life hard to cope with, i.e. most of us at some point in our lives - and especially so over the last few years. The book includes numerous anecdotes from her personal life and a large sprinkle of sarcasm and hyperbole, but it is grounded in the science of mindfulness. To let everyone have a voice. Please respect one another by giving everybody the chance to contribute without interruption and by not dominating or disrupting theYou are welcome to book one Host or Facilitator meeting per day this excludes meetings with Ruby Wax, Mindfulness or Cafe Conversations. Please do not book into more than one meeting a day (aside from the Ruby meeting, Mindfulness or Cafe Conversations), both to make sure that as many people as possible can access our meetings as and when they need them, and so that you have time to properly decompress after each meeting. This Mental Health Awareness Week (May 8-14), we revisit our interview with comedian Ruby Wax, who famously suffers from anxiety and depression, in which she reveals how to combat ‘frazzled’ moments in just three minutes. The Facilitator’s role is to ensure everyone that would like to speak gets a chance to, that the topics of conversation are appropriate for the space and that attendees are both present and respectful of the space and one another. The world may feel like a scarier place than ever and 2020 has definitely been a year we can collectively write off, but Wax also reminds us in her straight-shooting and humorous manner that there are still things to be thankful for. In And Now for the Good News Ruby has investigated how recent and new developments in technology, education, business, health, food and social change are turning our world into a better place than it’s ever been. Drawing on brand new research, compelling case studies and exercises to reframe your thinking, this is your guide to embrace change. Frazzled Cafe Facilitated meetings run for an hour and Hosted meetings run for 45 minutes. Both styles start with a run-through of our guidelines to ensure a confidential, respectful and safe environment for all of our attendees. It is important to us that these are adhered to.

All in all, this is an uplifting and hopeful book and one that I would recommend to anyone who feels that the world is headed in the wrong direction. I can't quite embrace the mindfulness that Wax endorses so enthusiastically, but I'm totally on board with all the other messages in this engaging and positive book. The long sentences, long paragraphs, the very little use of comas and full stoped, made me a bit anxious, so I didn't enjoy that at all. The sense of humour got on the way of actual good information, and on top of that, along the book there are witty racist jokes sprinkle around that just made my eyes roll. Also I'm not sure who is the target audience of the book, some parts read very light and even over explained, that made me think this is for the older generation who lost touch with technology and aren't informed. But having so much I formation delivered in a speedy way, made think it was for YA as they can take all of that in without many problems.

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The Trust has partnered with MIND in Mid Herts and the local PCN (the Primary Care Network of our 3 GP surgeries) to create a Wellbeing Hub. Its aim is to support Harpenden residents who have concerns about their mental wellbeing at an early stage before they become unwell and need counselling or cognitive behavioural therapy. We know how important it is to stay connected in these unprecedented and uncertain times. Frazzled Cafe meetings are a supportive online community where you can come and talk in a safe, non-judgemental space about what’s really going on for you. Ruby Wax compares the difference between schooling in China and Finland, such as in China where mental health issues bring shame to familes, versus in Finland where they discuss how stories make them feel and why people do things. I now hold nightly meetings for 50-100 people. We also have trained hosts who hold smaller meetings for up to 15 attendees throughout the day – you can sign up for either at FrazzledCafe.org, and it’s free. Attendees have said things such as, “By coming here, it calms the chaos in my mind... you get that instant, raw connection that brings out the true essence of what it means to be human.” I’ve said throughout my life: “Talking is half the cure.”

I think, if you have a general interest in how the world is or needs to become more compassionate and "humanised" then this may be a book that you could dip into to get a few examples of what people are doing now. As a record of social history it will work, not least due to the nods to Covid-19 which hit around the time of publication and resulted in a few "additions" to the text. But, I'm sorry, as an uplifting and relatable read in the same compelling vein of Ms Wax's first two books, this just didn't do it for me. In the Business section she writes about new models of businesses that are ‘going green’ in companies such as the outdoor clothing company Patagonia, based in California. They believe they owe the earth for the industrial impact of business and consequently give away 10% of all profits and are very conscientious about what products they use because the textile industry is one of the most chemically intensive industries on earth, second only to agriculture. This course puts you in charge. After six weeks you can practice what you learned – not just for Christmas, for life. There’s no running to someone and asking them to patch up your broken psyche. You’re your own PT for your brain. And Now For The Good News... :To the Future with Love by Ruby Wax looks at different things like education and food to see what the good thigns are that are coming, or are here already, just not in a big way, yet.As Ruby explains the term frazzled as when someone is feeling constant stress. "Stress is helpful to a degree, it's what gets us out of bed in the morning, but it stops being helpful when someone is stressed about being stressed and is then caught in a constant loop, which can lead to feeling overwhelmed."

I personally wanted to learn how to de-frazzle and, even more urgently, find a method to defuse my depression. After much research, I found out mindfulness and cognitive therapy (called MBCT) had the best results, as far as empirical evidence goes, in dealing with stress, depression and anxiety. The word mindfulness gives me the same vibes as dream-catchers and lentils, but Oxford University offers a master’s programme in MBCT so I thought there must be something to it. So I took the course, wrote my dissertation, spun it with comedy and boom, then got a book and show out of it. That’s killing multiple birds with one stone. Welcome to Frazzled Cafe, an online facilitated peer-to-peer wellbeing support group, patroned by Ruby Wax, that is here for you seven days a week.

These days she promotes understanding of the brain and campaigns for greater mental health awareness and destigmatisation. You would be forgiven for thinking 2020 was not the year for a book about good news. But now might be the time we need it most. Ruby Wax is here to reassure us with her brand new book, And Now For The Good News. This is her positivity prescription, showing us the green shoots of optimism and change forcing their way up and into the sunlight.