Daring To Take Up Space

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Featuring honest conversations with students past and present, Taking Up Space goes beyond the buzzwords of diversity and inclusion and explores what those words truly mean for young black girls today.

The truth is that people can only feel connected to you if you are occasionally open and able to talk about yourself. Most are simply toxic to our being simply because their needs and way of existing force us to compromise ourselves and our happiness. Whether it’s fear of commitment, insecurity, jealousy, or a tendency to be controlling, the real obstacle is a fundamental lack of trust—both in ourselves and in our partner.Thinkers50 Management Thinker of 2015 Whitney Johnson has a goal: to help us identify and achieve our dreams. NAMED ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR BY BLOOMBERG Leadership is not about titles, status, and wielding power. Ultimately, authenticity is the only way to connect with others genuinely; how can others relate to you and develop a deep connection with you if they never hear what you feel and want?

So if your parent had ignored or not paid attention to you, you would receive the message that you were unimportant and did not deserve a place in the world. Perhaps you know you need to change, but part of you is afraid – of disappointment or of being attacked. As much as possible, trust that other people want to get to know the real you, not a made-up version based on their expectations. The world at large has this attitude, “What makes you so special that you think you deserve an extraordinary life?Finally, Whitney's model brings out the businesswoman in her; she teaches us to Do, to execute our dreams. Drawn from hundreds of hours of one-on-one interviews with the astronauts, their loved ones, NASA personnel, and myriad experts, and filled with vivid and unforgettable detail, Rocket Men is the definitive account of one of America’s finest hours. You may think you need to know who you are and feel secure before expressing yourself or socialising. Because narcissistic parents are often controlling and possessive and like to tell their children how to live, their children may be deprived of the opportunity to develop their sense of self. Do you find it challenging to promote yourself in situations where it is appropriate, such as a job interview?

So if you are with someone you cannot ‘read’ or who does not seem to tell you what to do, it would bring you deep anxiety. You may even fill in a gap left by one of your parents’ absence and stand in as a surrogate partner. They may not be allowed to have their thoughts or feelings and are constantly ridiculed and repressed. On the one hand, you can not help but see how things can get better, be highly efficient and wise, and be good at what you do. I’m sure I dreamed it a million different ways, and that plenty of them were ridiculous, but I think the daydreams were training for writing, and I also think they spurred me to pursue my dreams for real.These four types of trust are not only the basis of healthy relationships, they are also the foundation of emotional well-being and freedom from fear. You have the right to be imperfect and accepted for who you are, even if you have flaws and limitations. Even when others are expressing distress, you can practice ‘just’ listening and offering your quiet presence. You've been conditioned to believe that taking up space will result in others labelling you as "arrogant" or "showing off.

Some parents do not abuse their children but are so emotionally vulnerable that they rely on their children for support rather than be in the caretaking roles. If your parents are or were emotionally volatile, violent, or abusive, your nervous system will be on high alert.However, they may find it challenging to find people who can love them how they deserve to be loved. Years of conditioning have taught you that taking up space will cause you to be criticized by others as “arrogant” or “showing off. I am so incredibly grateful that a friend introduced me to Danielles blog posts, and recommended this book. If someone is trying to give you feedback, sit back and allow yourself to evaluate what is being said objectively.